You don’t remember Teresa Heinz Kerry? Ketchup heiress? She was the source of his wealth. I do remember John Forbes Kerry was going to be the new JFK, even though, as the joke goes, “don’t tase me, bro” was the first time anyone had been electrified by a John Kerry speech.

Cindy McCain was kind of hot in 2008. Dude married younger, though.

I’m an October 1985 baby so the first president I remember was H.W. Bush. Earliest memory is Christmas ‘88, earliest world event I can remember was Desert Storm. Earliest sporting event was when the Redskins won the Super Bowl after the 1991 season. It took until 2018 for D.C. to win another championship unless you count D.C. United or the Kastles (is World Team Tennis even still around?), which you shouldn’t. We didn’t have a baseball team until 2005 except for the Orioles, not even minor league except the Potomac Cannons (now Potomac Nationals, the Nats’ single-A affiliate) and Bowie Baysox (the Orioles’). The Richmond Braves were guess-who’s AAA team, if you consider them local.

I’m about to kick back a Pepsi Zero Sugar Wild Cherry & Cream. I usually drink sodas (and energy drinks) for the sugar so diet is usually useless for me, but I just ate a big plate of Innovasians microwave General Tso’s chicken, which I hoghly recommend, so I’m good.

Eh, the Pepsi’s ok. The cream tastes chemically, though that may just be the aspartame. PHENYLKETONURICS: CONTAINS PHENYLALANINE. My grocery store has started carrying Tahitian Treat; I don’t know if they’re reintroducing it or if it was just unavailable here.